If you are going through a divorce, it?s likely that your spouse is one of the last people you want to speak to. However, there will probably be times when it?s necessary to communicate with him or her. For example, you might need to discuss where your kids will go to school next year or what you want to do with the family home. Here are some tips for communicating with your spouse during divorce:
Don?t Talk to Your Spouse When You?re Upset
It is a bad idea to speak to your house when you?re upset about something. Your emotions could take over and you may end up screaming at your spouse and saying hurtful things. This will just stress you out even more and complicate your case. That?s why you should give yourself at least a day to calm down before having any communication with your spouse.
Know How to Pick Your Battles
During a divorce, it is important to know how to pick your battles. If you argue with everything your spouse says, it will just create more conflict. For example, if you found out your spouse let your kids stay up past their bedtime last weekend, you may just want to let the issue go.
Pay Attention to Your Tone
Sometimes we?re not always aware of our tone when we speak to others. When you are speaking to your spouse, it is important to pay better attention to how you talk to him or her. If you speak very loudly, for example, your spouse might think that you are yelling, which can create more tension.
Be Careful About What You Post on Social Media
If you are going through a divorce, it is especially important to be cautious about what you post on social media. Resist the urge to post anything related to your divorce. If your spouse sees your post, he or she may become upset.
State Your Preferred Modes of Communication
In the very beginning, you should tell your spouse how you prefer to be contacted. For instance, if you and your spouse tend to get into arguments very easily, it may be best to avoid talking on the phone and stick to emails.
Avoid Talking About Past Issues
There is no point in discussing past issues with your spouse. Talking about your spouse?s past affairs or his or her financial troubles will not do anybody any good. It is best to stick to present issues.
Speaking to your spouse might not always be easy, but you can try to make the best out of it. However, if your spouse ever becomes so aggressive that communicating with him or her is impossible, you may want to contact your divorce attorney. He or she can handle communication between you and your spouse to make things easier.
Many divorce attorneys offer free initial consultations, so it does not hurt to schedule a meeting with one. Contact divorce attorney Phoenix AZ locals trust for any questions.
Thank you to Hildebrand Law for providing tips on communicating with your spouse during a divorce.
*Mark L. Scroggins is *board-certified in family law by the Texas Board of Legal Specialization. Unless otherwise noted, other attorneys are not *board-certified.
**Super Lawyers (a Thomson Reuters service, awarded to Mark Scroggins 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021)
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